10 Gracious Acts Whenever We Leave Home

renior bal

After more than a year of unprecedented time spent in the confines of our homes, most of us have begun to venture out in public again. I don’t know about you, but I’ve found some of my manners to be a little rusty. Every time I go somewhere, I’m grateful to see someone displaying these gracious acts, reminding me of simple things we can do to make life a little more elegant for everyone. 

  1. Countenance Counts ~ Countenance refers to our facial expressions. We’ve all been duly warned about RBF (resting biddy face). I’ve certainly caught myself deep in thought and realized my mug was less than pleasing. How nice it is to go out and see friendly faces again. 
  2. Right On ~ I wish I had a nickel for every time I reminded my students to walk on the right side of the hallway when changing classes. Foot traffic flows more smoothly when we stay to the right side of the sidewalk, stairs, and escalator. 
  3. Hold the Door ~ It still seems chivalrous for a man to open a door for a woman; however, everyone who is able should hold the door for anyone who is approaching. I always feel I’ve passed a kindred spirit when another woman holds the door for me. 
  4. Wipe the Sink ~ I was recently at a highway rest stop. After washing her hands, a woman took a clean paper towel and quickly wiped down the counter before I stepped up to use the sink. I offered a her a “thank you”, but I really wanted to applaud and cheer this rare gracious act! 
  5. Please and Thank You ~ This week, I was surprised by how cordial a man in front of me was to the employee in a drive-through window. (I also noticed how quickly her attitude reflected his.) He reminded me how important it is to be friendly and respectful to the hard-working people who serve us throughout our communities. 
  6. Trash Talk ~ My husband and I were on a road trip this month and noticed the cleanliness of many of the towns we traveled through. Unless you’re Oscar the Grouch, we all want to live in communities where streets and sidewalks are lined with flowers, not garbage. We can do our part by vowing to never toss even the smallest piece of trash out the car window or onto the ground.  
  7. Dressing Rooms ~ Have you ever walked into a store dressing room and seen piles of clothing scattered on the floor? When trying on clothes, we should always put garments we aren’t purchasing back on the hangers and on the rack provided. No store employee should have to feel like they’re picking up a teenager’s messy bedroom. 
  8. Elevator Etiquette ~ While traveling, I was exiting a hotel elevator as a young boy and girl were waiting to get on. Obviously well-taught, the boy gently scooted his sister to the side and waited for me to step out before entering the elevator. It was such a sweet and memorable display of good manners from a child. 
  9. Table Manners ~ This summer, my husband and I took our grandson to a nice outdoor restaurant and sat near a couple with their grandchildren. During the meal, we overheard subtle reminders to put napkins on laps, use a quiet voice, and put phones away. It warmed my heart to see these grandparents taking time to patiently teach valuable lifelong lessons.
  10. The Golden Rule ~ Whenever my husband and I spend time with our grown children, we are always proud of their tolerance and acceptance of everyone we encounter, no matter how different they may be from us. We live in a diverse and changing world. Some may call their behavior being politically-correct, but it’s really just being kind and following the Golden Rule.

    Though most of us are thankfully past lockdowns and quarantines, it seems Covid may be with us for a while longer, forcing us to be aware of the contagious nature of the virus. As we cautiously move through our days, let’s remember being courteous is contagious, too. Just imagine if we made gracious acts like these go equally viral.ยง

    “Manners are the sensitive awareness of the feelings of others.
    If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use.”
    ~ Emily Post

Featured Art ~ Bal du moulin de la Galette by Pierre-Auguste Renoir, 1876

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Starting the Year on the Right Foot

When I signed us up for the First Day Hike, it sounded like an exhilarating way to begin the new year in the peace and quiet of Brown County State Park, but the experience proved to be more challenging and eye-opening than expected.

When Mike and I reached the trailhead where the New Year’s Day trek began, we were surprised to be joined by more than 200 hikers. There were loud hikers. Pushy hikers. Slow hikers. Hikers on cell phones. Hikers with unruly yapping dogs and children. So many children.

I looked at my husband like a deer in the headlights. “This might be the hardest two-mile hike I’ve ever been on,” I whispered unnecessarily, as he knew exactly what I was thinking. We almost bailed on the First Day Hike before it even began, but I felt it might be a test, not of my endurance, but of my tolerance.

I used to have a wealth of patience. When I was a teacher and mom to young children, patience was my superpower. For more than 25 years, I willingly trapped myself in a small square room with more than a hundred middle schoolers a day. Although I’ve always enjoyed time alone, I loved interacting with students, co-workers, neighbors, family, friends, and even strangers.

Now I’m retired and live in the boonies. I go days without talking to anyone save my easy-going husband and the forest critters. If not for the necessary task of grocery shopping, I would happily remain in the woods like a hermit. I’ve admittedly become a tad intolerant of my fellow man.

We fell into line with the army of hikers who snaked single-file through the hills of Brown County at a steady comfortable pace. I noticed how nature worked its magic to cast a spell of courtesy and civility over the group. While navigating the rugged trail covered in wet leaves and squishy mud, we chatted quietly, as hikers often do, about the weather, foliage and fauna, wildlife, and other favorite hiking spots.

I talked at length with a loquacious teenage boy whose mother seemed to welcome the break. I discovered one of the hikers was from the same small Illinois town as my dad. I petted a cute scruffy dog whose owner had come to the event alone with her rescued pup.

Our First Day Hike was over before we knew it. We said goodbye to our new friends and wished each other a happy new year. Hiking is often a chance for solitude in the great outdoors, but our walk in the woods with 200 other nature-lovers gave me a feeling of community and comradery I didn’t realize was missing from my life.

My new year got off on the right foot with a burst of energy, an appreciation for nature, and most surprisingly, a reminder to have a gracious and open heart towards all of the people I meet on my path along the way.